Against

I’m against pain unless it’s necessary to create life or to learn a lesson of survival; I’m against dying young unless that’s really what somebody wished for themselves; I’m against little dogs barking with a high pitch; I’m against having sex unwillingly and I’m against not having it when I want it; I’m against heartbreak; I’m against setting the alarm clock and I’m against waking up from a wonderful dream; I’m against feeling hungry or unsatisfied in any of my other physiological needs; I’m against not following one’s desires; I’m against social mandates; I’m against dressing up for a party I don’t want to go to; I’m against bride’s white gowns and definitely against tuxedos; I’m against high hills and ties; I’m against corsets and any kind of undergarment with wires; I’m against Valentine’s Day and Women’s Day; I’m against engagement rings and wedding rings and I’m against becoming “Mrs. Someone” once I'm married; I'm against plastic flowers; I'm against porn; I’m against advertisement and I’m against seeing women’s breast and butts virtually everywhere; I’m against silence in the museums; I’m against art that doesn’t say anything; I’m against elitism; I’m against schools not having colorful walls; I’m against the smell of hospitals; I’m against rain for more than a week and I’m against not having rain for months; I’m against feeling sick; I’m against flakey friends; I’m against married friends setting up dates for single friends; I’m against online dating services; I’m against bullshit; I’m against disappointment and deception; I’m against having to smile when I want to cry; I’m against feeling pressure and I’m against stress; I’m against owing money to the bank; I’m against private property and I’m against a monetary system; I’m against not having enough; I’m against not being good enough; I’m against feeling ugly; I’m against anyone who makes me feel like an idiot; I’m against being ignored; I’m against having to make sense; I’m against psychological manipulation; I’m against dogmatic thinking; I’m against not making questions and I’m against needing to have all the answers; I’m against slow internet connection; I’m against “this service is not available at the moment, try again later, sorry for the inconveniences”; I’m against security checkpoints; I’m against fast food and fast cars; I’m against flying on a plane; I’m against grownups hitting children and husbands hitting their wives; I’m against judging people by their appearance; I’m against being expected to behave like a lady; fuck, I’m against not using bad words; I’m against you snoring if you're sleeping beside me; I’m against getting completely wasted and I’m against hangover; I’m against the music being so loud I have to scream to have a conversation; I’m against the AC being too damn high; I’m against losing precious memories; I'm against sweating too much except when I'm sick, working out, or having crazy sex; I’m against anti-age cream; I’m against small apartments and I’m against huge mansions; I’m against disparity and discrimination; by all means I’m against war; I'm against prison; I'm against slavery and any kind of human exploitation; I’m against cancer; I’m against being rewarded for kissing ass and being punished for speaking up; I’m against unfair laws and any kind of torture or violence; I'm against obedience and against punishment; I’m against misunderstandings and wrong conclusions; I’m against not having passion but I’m also against obsession; I’m against arrogant pricks; I’m against long guitar solos; I’m against people not having any sense of rhythm; I’m against singing out of tune; I’m against Hawaiian shirts; I’m against leopard tights and gold shoes matching a gold purse; I’m against too much jewelry and too much makeup; I’m against being too normal; I’m against not having imagination; I’m against friends not showing up for my birthday party; I’m against not hearing “and you?” after I asked “how are you?”; I’m against not returning calls; I’m against sharing my dessert; I’m against cakes with artificial colors and flavors; I’m against microwave cooking; I’m against people who don’t know but teach; I’m against arbitrary rules and prohibitions and I’m against not being able to make an exception; I’m against filling out forms; I’m against strict classifications; I’m against narrow minded public office employees; I’m against being stopped by the police and I’m against having to have a police at all; I’m against borders; I’m against casinos; I’m against having to pay for basic needs like water, food, housing, health and education; I’m against abandonment; I’m against bombs and fire arms of any kind; I’m against hunting for sports; I’m against being competitive and always wanting to win; I’m against not looking at the moon when it’s up there; I’m against being inside on a sunny day; I’m against not having vacations in the summer; I’m against having my period when I go to the beach; I’m against hair removal; I’m against fake blondes and fake boobs; I’m against anorexic models; I’m against rock stars and movie stars; I’m against authority in general; I’m against birds shitting right on my head and I’m against stepping on dog’s poop; I’m against waiting in line, particularly for the ladies’ toilette when the men’s room is empty; I’m against waiting too long to order food when I'm hungry and I’m definitely against the waiter asking me if everything tastes good every five minutes; I’m against having to tip when service wasn’t that good; I’m against being asked for my ID to buy alcohol, tobacco, spray paint or glue; I’m against a power outage; I’m against being chased in a nightmare; I’m against following a strict plan; I’m against having fear; I’m against feeling sad; I’m against being powerless; I’m against talking too much when there’s really nothing more to say.